running away and getting cought. waiting this long to do what i want and now it hurts all the people i know ..... its hard to be the reason why people are hurting. i mean my intention was not to hurt them. what hurts me is that no matter what i would have done to want to move out it would have gone the same way. i wonder how things are going to change. i guess im a little scared .... dont get me wrong i dont regret anything im just sad that I am the person that hurt other people. i dont want to hurt them. who does? i guess completely leaving the movie theater might have made them a bit worried. try a lot. i duno i know that they love me and i dont want to hurt them by moving out that is the last thing to do. i just wanna be with joseph i dont know why and i couldnt exsplain it if anyone asked me to. i feel like moving in with joseph is right. i just dont wanna hurt anyone by doing it. i still wanna talk to everyone and all that the only thing that i want thats gonna be differant is my living situation .... i want my parents to come visit me and have them talk to me everyday. i dont want this to be such a sad situation. i just think that i wanna fix things ...... i wanna be at josephs and i wanna make sure that i still have my family constant and a part of my life ALL the time everyday. i duno i screwed a lot up by trying to make myself happy thats a hard thing to take. anyway, i guess it'll work out the way its supposed to. i just want things to be better. i want us all happy and i guess thats not going to happen...least not right now anyway. i am nauseated by this hole situation.